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The Scarlet & Black

The Scarlet & Black Horoscope: The signs on 10/10


By the Celestial Maiden & the Celestial Minion


LIBRA: Tries to host a cute brunch pregame but invites too many people. Everyone gets half a mimosa and a bite of a pancake and has a great time.

SCORPIO: Holds their own personal competition and hooks up with their ex on Elm Street, their current lover on East Street, and their crush on High Street.

SAGITTARIUS: Goes to the afternoon showing of “The Met Opera Live: Turandot” in Harris and plays a drinking game in the back knowing they’ll get caught.

CAPRICORN: Tries to revive the old tradition in the dorms alone, and is found passed out in Main at three in the morning with a bottle in their hand having accomplished their goal. But at what cost?

AQUARIUS: Is too drunk during D-Hall lunch and dumps a full tray of food on their mortal enemy. Takes a big nap afterwords and misses all the fun.

PISCES: Goes around the parties with cigarettes, observing without participating. Spontaneously decides to take the campus shot and somehow ends up drunker than everyone else.

ARIES: Decides today is the day for some DIY body modification, and takes matters into their own hands. Wakes up on Sunday with an off-center tongue piercing and a new lease on life.

TAURUS: Gets a free food pass for all of the Fall Fest food trucks and eats an incredibly sampling. Inevitably pukes in the bouncy house after, but it was worth it.

GEMINI: Finally aces their keg stand, but gets booed out of the party for finishing the last of the alcohol.

CANCER: Tries to party with the big kids, but decides Fall Fest is more their speed. Makes explicit crafts at a Weekend event and is asked to leave.

LEO: Climbs out on a High Street roof without permission to see and be seen. Gets kicked out of the event and ends up at the surprisingly peaceful Pub.

VIRGO: Gets really drunk and decides they are now a rescue dog. Goes around the party offering their “help” to mostly sober people while an actual rescue dog follows them in confusion.

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