The Scarlet & Black

The Independent Student News Site of Grinnell College

The Scarlet & Black

The Scarlet & Black

Feven Getachew
Feven Getachew
May 6, 2024
Michael Lozada
Michael Lozada
May 6, 2024
Nathan Hoffman
Nathan Hoffman
May 6, 2024
Harvey Wilhelm `24.
Harvey Wilhelm
May 6, 2024

The Scarlet & Black Horoscope: Thanksgiving advice for the signs

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By the Celestial Maiden and the Celestial Minion

SCORPIO Allow the road to carry you home, even if there is no football on the TV. You are thankful your time has almost ended.

SAGITTARIUS Go to an acquaintance’s dinner and get gifted wool socks. You are thankful for your charm.

CAPRICORN Meals can only last so long and there’s always dishes to be done. You are thankful for feeling useful.

AQUARIUS The mashed potatoes hold long lost secrets. Look for the shapes the butter makes. You are thankful for mystery.

PISCES Go back to your roots and examine the patterns in the carpet – they hold the secret to the universe. You are thankful for the return.

ARIES Guests may be coming over soon, but do not stress about vacuuming the carpets – your mess will be on full display no matter what you do. You are thankful for love.

TAURUS Get in a fight with a family member, maybe an uncle. Feel righteous. You are thankful for your truths.

GEMINI Take a long walk with someone Thursday night. Walk until you can feel pumpkin pie in your toes. You are thankful for movement.

CANCER You may know what is coming but you do not know what is now. Or you do not understand. You are thankful for loneliness.

LEO Remember where you were a year ago. Can you still hear the drums, or have they faded into the pounding in your head? You are thankful for the cycles.

VIRGO Do not wear the ugly sweater; be the ugly sweater. You are thankful for your warmth.

LIBRA The turkey caught on fire and your mom spilled wine on her blouse. It’s a shitshow. You carry on eating bread. You are thankful for your level head.

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