8:00 a.m.—Wake up to “Let’s Get Lost” by Carly Rae Jepsen — always studying for Pub Quiz [fempire].
8:40 a.m.—Get a call about NSO; arrive to the JRC sweaty and flustered. Consider drinking a Coke, but decide it’s too early for so much corn syrup.
8:45 a.m.—Change my mind and get the Coke anyways. Thx @spencergrill.
8:46 a.m.—Cry about the lack of large iced cups. #neverforget
9:00 a.m.—Prep for the NSO activities of the day (aka organize 1000 glow sticks and answer passive-aggressive emails).
11:00 a.m.—Abuse my awesome golf cart privileges and drive home to Haines.
11:10 a.m.—Drive first-years (“Can you take us to the Joe Rosenfield Center?”) in the golf cart.
11:12 a.m.—First-years get out of the golf cart. They are kind of dazed after experiencing my reckless driving. Didn’t crash though, so they should feel lucky.
12:27 p.m.—Lunch in the D-Hall — weep about the missing soft-serve machine and drink more Coke.
2:04 p.m.—Burst into tears in the JRC (not like that’s a first) after a first-year yells at me because their personalized schedule is messed up.
2:06 p.m.—Spend more real (non-dining) dollars on another Coke and pull myself together. Send an email to the first-years with their new personalized schedule info.
3:32 p.m.—Give [vitaioli] megaphone privileges and hear her screaming at first-years (“IF YOU HAD TO BE ON A REALITY TV SHOW, WHICH WOULD IT BE? WHAT WAY DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS PREPARED?”) during pal-a-palooza.
4:18 p.m.—Daydream about my bed. Try to send emails while watching Cutthroat Kitchen (it doesn’t work).
5:24 p.m.—Show up late to a meeting with my assistants to get ready for the rest of the night. They pretend not to notice how frazzled I am and do everything I ask them to do without complaint. #blessed
6:09 p.m.—Go to dinner (thx Student Affairs for the full meal plan during NSO). Feel simultaneously rejuvenated and slain by cheesy baked potatoes.
7:30 p.m.—Go to Harris to run mics for a Community Values Session. Awkwardly squat while the first-years answer questions.
8:50 p.m.—Drive the golf cart across Mac Field in the dark; see my life flash before my eyes when I go over a bump.
9:21 p.m.—Check in at some events and listen to “Hands to Myself” by Selena Gomez on repeat while I drive in the golf cart.
10:07 p.m.—I’m running on a lot of adrenaline (from NSO or the amount of Coke running through my veins?), so [nashclar] pierces my ear; [schieren] tries and fails to pierce the other ear.
11:29 p.m.—Try to steal the aux cord and play top 40 hits; fail.
12:16 a.m.—Watch Bachelor in Paradise (rip Izzy and Vinny) with [nashclar], [goldmanm], [schieren], and [tonachel] while playing Tinder.
1:48 a.m.—Online shop instead of going to bed. Buy face masks because #treatyourself.
2:06 a.m.—Fall asleep; sweetly dream of the Minnesota State Fair.
