Aries: Fake Moon Landing
Taurus: The Grassy Knoll
Gemini: Elvis faked his death
Cancer: HAARP
Leo: JFCMSB
Virgo: Water fluoridators
Libra: Black helicopters
Scorpio: Area 51
Sagittarius: Flat Earthers
Capricorn: We’re living in a computer simulation
Aquarius: Chemtrails
Pisces: MKUltra
— Sister Aurora Impulse