Aries: Fake Moon Landing

Taurus: The Grassy Knoll

Gemini: Elvis faked his death

Cancer: HAARP

Leo: JFCMSB

Virgo: Water fluoridators

Libra: Black helicopters

Scorpio: Area 51

Sagittarius: Flat Earthers

Capricorn: We’re living in a computer simulation

Aquarius: Chemtrails

Pisces: MKUltra

— Sister Aurora Impulse