“From the Mixed-Up Staff Ed Files of Mr. Michael J. Kleine”

We here at the S&B, as we look down on the town of Grinnell from our ivory tower, do declare that the construction of a bike path to the Wal-Mart area is good for the people. And if it’s good for the plebian masses, then we applaud it. We’ve noticed the Schwinns and jalopies rusting in their green shackles, like aging steeds aching to ride once more in the free Iowan pastures. What is there not to quietly appreciate from our oaken chairs and libraries of first-edition masterpieces of classic literature? The bike path will offer unprecedented accessibility to the manufactured bric-à-brac lining the shelves of capitalist storehouses. In addition to offering a safe passage along the most treacherous of this town’s byways, this silk road of sorts will reflect the College’s embrace of an environmentally conscious ethos.  So, as we sip our aged mead and mull over our erudite tomes, we gleefully acknowledge this simple advancement.